Sex is a big question mark

What part of your sexuality seems the most mysterious to you, or what part are you still learning about?

I’ve always been pretty open and experimental when it comes to my sex life. Probably more so as I’ve gotten older and more comfortable in my own skin, and definitely more since I started blogging. I just never thought of sex as something you should hide or keep quiet about. Everyone does it. It’s not a big secret.

One of the things I’ve always found perplexing is how, for me, pain is connected to pleasure. It wasn’t until I started experimenting with sensation play did I even know pain was such a strong pleasure trigger for me. It really got me off. Sex is enjoyable without the pain but it sure as hell is a lot hotter when you you add that little zing. Pull my hair and pinch my nipples when you are fucking me. Smack my ass until it burns and my wetness begins to run down my leg. Bite my shoulder or my thigh when I am about to orgasm. Add that bit of pain to the experience and the pleasure is magnified.

There is no happiness without courage nor virtue without struggle.

Emile, Jean-Jacques Rousseau

Pain does not need to be the antithesis of pleasure. It can be an ally. It can help open the gate to pleasure and welcome it in. You just have to stop looking at it as something evil. There is no pain without pleasure, no joy without heartache, no sweetness of honey without the sting of a bee. If we accept that joy or pleasure in life can be exponentially better after someone has experienced heartache and pain, then why is it so difficult to accept when it comes to sex?

Note: This is an older prompt from The Erotic Journal Challenge. I may be posting several things this month based on old writing prompts that I never finished at the time. I have to address the 123 122 items in my draft folder eventually.

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