I got the job!!
Things have moved so fast with this. Just a week ago I got a cold call from a recruiter and today I landed the job. Apparently I am pleasant and personable and appear to know my stuff. I’m glad that came across because I kind of felt like I blew it with this morning’s interview. I thought I could have been more concise with some of my answers. I’m sure I cut the VP off a couple times. And that question about why I am leaving my current place of employment? I have no idea how I pulled that answer off. Now I get to freak out for the next two weeks before the new job actually starts.
I believe in my ability to do my job and do it very well. Problem is I always second guess and pick on all the little things that weren’t quite up to my perfect standards. If nobody else notices or they feel it is too insignificant to mention, it shouldn’t bother me either. As the saying goes, we are our own worst critics. How do I learn to be my best supporter rather than my worst critic?
Speaking of things I felt I may have blown today, I gave in and sent him a message this morning. Nothing major. I just said I miss him. He hasn’t responded. Not that I thought he would, I did hope, but he hasn’t even opened the message.
I thought about that message all day. I was going back and forth between thinking how pathetic it was and how empowering it was. Pathetic to still have hope and to think he would say he misses me too. I was the one who said goodbye to him after all. I should just leave it at that.
But then I think that me telling him I miss him or want him or whatever is about me and my desires and my process of moving on. It isn’t really about him at all. It takes strength to admit our feelings, our wants and desires. It takes courage to say what is in our heart when we don’t know what, if any, response we will get.
I’m to side with strength and courage. No way I’m pathetic.